AirenWoodmoon

Not quite dead!

Short version of what has happened since I last wrote a journal entry (or really played around DA at all):
- Had a nervous breakdown
- Quit my job as an accountant
- Moved to California
- Trying to make it as an artist now
- Made an etsy for my jewelry
- Another surgery
- Still searching for ways to make a livable income
- Started an online comic

It's been so long since I last played around with DA that everything is new to me again.  And some things are just new.  And weird.  (What the heck is Sta.sh? And an activity feed now?)

Anyway, expect an art dump from me here soon.  There's a lot I need to add here, cleanup and whatnot.  Bear with me!

Anyway, here are links if anyone wants them:

My currently running comic which is an alternate universe where in Thor is a merman and Jane Foster is a marine biologist:
wolfbladearts.tumblr.com/

Handmade jewelry and knitwear by me:
www.etsy.com/shop/WolfbladeArt…

I'm alive.  Aaaliiiiiive.....

And painting again.  Finished two this year so far and I wish I had a better way of posting them online other than taking crappy photographs of them.  My scanner doesn't allow me to scan them in pieces anymore (that wasn't the easiest task but at least I could do it.  Flatbed scanners aren't flatbed anymore...) so all I have is the camera for the moment.  Oh well.

I'd be on DA more if it wasn't as buggy as shit.  It's like it gives me five minutes to play around and then starts slowly dying and ignoring my commands and that damned "Drag and collect" button is going to drive me batty.  It's like it's having a seizure on the middle of my page.  Can't see art or read descriptions through the hyper blinking button.  

Oh yeah, and I can't select moods anymore in these journal entries.  DA, why did you break yourself?  Don't be microsoft.

Stolen from Stitchedmoon.

01: why did you become an artist (if you don't think of yourself as an artist, just tell me why you draw)
One Easter I found a sketchbook and was grumpy and hormonal so I decided to sit in the park and draw instead of interact with my family.  This happened in Freshman year of High School.  And then originally I was going to go into Genetics and major in Biology in college, until I realized that through every single class all I did was sit there and draw.  So I majored in Fine Arts, got my BA, and was promptly slammed to the ground by Real Life.  I think of myself as an artist because that's just what I am.  I may not make money at it, but it's what and who I am.

02: what do you love about creating art
Being able to bring across the ideas and images floating around in my head.  They're very visual and colorful and it's a way to bring them out.  And of course I love it when I do it well.

03: do you prefer to create art or experience it?
Both.  I guess I prefer to create it but I experience it every day, so take from that as you will.

04: do you like your own art and why/why not
I'm trying to let go of my hatred for myself, and for not being where I want to be.  Sometimes I love it, sometimes I hate it, but I'm trying to let go of the perfectionism and the frustration and just create, good or bad.  For the last couple of months that has seemed to work so far. *crosses fingers*

05: if you could do art as a profession what sort of career path would you choose (if it is your profession, then simply elaborate)
If I could do it I would be freaking doing it right now.  Illustration.  Possibly comics.

06: what's your favorite thing(s) to draw and why?
Characters.  'Cause people. (Stitched, I'm just going to take your answer. )

07: does drawing ever make you upset/angry/want to quit forever?
See number 4.    I've finally tried to give up on having a career and making a living from my art, because it was suffocating the art until I was getting to that really dark, bad place again.  I don't want to be there.  I want to have fun and create, and letting go seems to have worked.  If it happens, it happens but I just want to have fun.  Not give myself concussions or try and stab myself with a pencil (I'm a little mentally unstable to boot).

08: are bananas awesome?
Yeap.  They'll hurt the roof of my mouth when I eat them sometimes though.  Bread will do the same thing.  I have no idea why.

09: what is your favorite medium to draw in (or craft or sculpt or sew or whatever)
My favorite is oil paint, hands down.  I draw the most, and then color in Photoshop the second most.  I've also taken to making clay dragons lately.  But oils will still be my first love.

10: does your skill as an artist affect any other skills/aspects of your life in any noticeable way good or bad?
I have skill, what?  No, it has absolutely no bearing on my job in Real Life as an admin/accountant.  My English degree does, but not my drawing skill.  Other than I think and act like an artist all the time?   I will stare at people I find fascinating, studying their clothes or their features.  Being an artist has made me a creeper!  Woo!

I'm still alive.  My art isn't, but what are you going to do.

I still don't know.  I'm about to turn 29 and I have no idea what the hell to do with my life.  I'm in transit.  And freaking out.  And generally just letting my fear and depression get the best of me.  Which has led to no art.  Sorry about that.

In three days it will mark the 15th anniversary of when I started drawing seriously.  15 years of making art that has had it's ups and downs and no matter what I'm going through right now and what might happen in the future, I don't want to lose that part of me.  Even if it won't be in the capacity I had originally hoped and dreamed for.

But anyway, I want to make something to mark the occasion.  Something for myself.  Something fun.  It's also the anniversary of one of my older character couples, so I was going to try and do their wedding picture, since I still actually remember their wedding day.  

I don't promise I'll have this sucker finished in three days, but by writing it down here I'll force myself to work on it, right?


And thanks Ckatt for all the kind notes, and inspiring me today.  

Sorry I haven't been around much at all lately.  The artblock has me at a very low place, and I kinda feel ready to give up, and yet I really don't want to at the same time.  So I'm trying to take it slow, draw only when I really feel like it instead of every day for fear my talent will wane.  I've just been sucked dry lately.

And I've started taking an accounting class, which between a 40 hr/week job and my sudden desire to become a guitarist, I've had no time for anything lately.  Well, time to go absolutely fangirl nuts over Thor, but that's not producing much art.  (Much good art I should say.)  I also haven't had time to color in the mornings like I have all year so far, so basically art has ground to a halt.

Basically a note to say I'm not dead, I'm still around and poking at my sketchbook with a stick like it's roadkill, but don't expect me to actually submit anything for a while.  Sorry.  Stuff will come back once I'm either out of classes, or finally explode for need of a creative outlet.